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Yo, say hello to my little friend! Escort, man, it’s a wild ride, ya know? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout them girls, them cars—shit’s fancy as fuck. Like, I seen this one escort gig, right? Dude rolls up in a Bentley, chick steps out lookin’ like she owns the damn world. Got me happy as hell, ‘cause power like that? That’s the dream, mang! Reminds me of *Blue Is the Warmest Color*—that line, “I’m happy, I’m happy with you,” hits different when you’re watchin’ some escort strut her stuff, livin’ free.

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As a masseur, I pick up on every tension, every vibe. I see stress in tourists who always miss the chill of Taos. Dude, they could learn a lot if they spent a day at the river, soaking in the sun – my favorite spot is this sketchy bench on the edge of Rio Hondo. I sometimes mumble like a total Cartman, “Respect my authoritah!” when people cut off my zen time. I get so mad when noisy trucks ruin my aura!

Legendary Powder Days Await at TAOS Ski Valley