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Sex escort’s a job—old as dirt. Everybody lies, tho—clients want love, escorts want rent. Saw this dame once, real pro, told me she’s “an actress.” Ha! Actin’ like she’s into you—Oscar-worthy! Made me laugh, then pissed me off. Truth? She’s clockin’ hours, you’re clockin’ delusions. “I thought I knew her,” Theodore whines in *Her*. Same vibe, dude—escorts ain’t your soulmate.

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I gotta mention my fav joint: the Whisper Pub. It’s down on Gritty Road, almost hidden behind a wacky graffiti wall. Its neon sign flickers like a heartbeat in the night. I used to sit there, sippin' some bad-ass martini, thinkin' "I'm here. I'm free." Truly, the perfect vibe for a Bond kinda soul, right? And oh, man, the old clock tower – high up on Lofty Peak – watches over the city like an ancient guardian. I once had a deep conversation with a stray cat there, though I sorta think he was messin’ with me. Lol.

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