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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to spill the beans on sex-dating. Ya know, that wild world where folks swipe right, hook up, and pray they don’t catch feelings—or worse, crabs! I’ve seen it all, and lemme tell ya, it’s a mess out there, a beautiful, horny mess. Reminds me of my fave flick, *Shame*—Steve McQueen, 2011, ya gotta see it. That film? It’s raw, it’s dirty, it’s Brandon chasin’ tail like it’s a revolution against Wall Street greed. “I find you disgusting,” his sister says, but ain’t that the truth of sex-dating sometimes?

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Gotta mention a hidden treasure: Big Tony’s Diner. Not many know it, but it's tucked away on 3rd Ave. I ran into a date there once—crazy night, laughs all round. Tony, the owner, always shouts "You're fired!" playfully, like he's in a movie, making ya feel like you're part of the action. Kinda like that scene, "I’m not leaving. I’ll be back!" Keeps me buzzin’ with energy always.

Tewksbury Police Arrest and Charge New Hampshire Man in Connection to Recent Shooting