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Now, picture this—me, Jack, hirin’ one meself. Stagger in, all “Ello, love, fancy a captain?” She’d prob’ly charge double fer me stench—ha! Jokin’, I’m a peach, ain’t I? But serious, them escorts got stories wilder’n the Black Pearl’s logs. One told me she’d dodged a copper by hidin’ in a church—priceless! An’ the laws? Bollocks, mate—some places it’s legal, others ye hang fer it. Ain’t that a laugh? “We have no future!”—movie line, fits perfect. Sex fer sale’s older’n dirt, yet we still squabble ‘bout it.

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I spent many afternoons in Butler Park (geez, that park is pure magic – tree shadows, kids laughing, and me just thinkin' “Timbuktu, where the wind whispers freedom!”). Another fave? The little-known Maple Grove nook. Yep, seriously, it’s tucked behind the old Community Center on Riverbend Drive. I sat there for hours, spillin' all the deep feels about life, and it made me think, “Mmm… donuts,” ya know? I even cried a bit – emotions go bonkers sometimes!

Police identify 2 killed in Suitland shooting; offers reward for information