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About New York City

God, it’s messy—oil everywhere, stains your shirt. Hate that part, makes me wanna scream. But the vibe? Kinda hot. Forbidden fruit, y’know? Like defusing an IED—sweaty, risky, thrilling. “This is my gift, my curse,” I mutter, picturing Bigelow filmin’ it. Sarcasm aside, it’s not my bag—too much trust in greasy strangers. You? Go for it, just don’t cry when it’s a letdown. Everybody lies, even the hands kneadin’ ya!

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Oh reelly, the streets can be a fickle mistress. Like, one minute, you’re chillin' at the artisan coffee joint on Ventura, jammin' with the locals, and the next minute, ya bump into a freakin’ ex – or even worse, run into a wild and wandering pleasure coach who just can’t get enough of these city secrets. Sites like the famed Universal Studios are mere specks of Hollywood magic – I mean, magic, I guess – but trust me, the real vibes hide in the narrow alleys off Laurel Canyon Blvd. There, every crack on the pavement whispers stories of debauchery and art, whispered in my ear, little by little.

Studio City residents react after fire erupts in middle of neighborhood and destroys home