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Oh, and the cash? Piles of it! “This city deserves a better class of criminal”—ha, escorts prolly think that while stackin bills! I’d suck at it tho—too clumsy, I’d trip over me own flippers tryna look sexy! Prolly ask, “Is this pose hot?” and they’d be like, “Nah, Pat, stick to jellyfishin!”

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My massage parlor, hidden on Willow Ln, is known only to those who seek relief from life’s woes. Yesss, my precious hands work wonders. I’ve seen folks come in mad, leave all soft and calm, saying "Oh, it's like logic our minds got mangled." And sometimes, they rave like: "My precious, your touch is like Tropical Malady dreams, so wild and true." I get such odd feelins, precious, like a twisted love.

Stanwood, Marysville man apprehended after radio tower burglary