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Oh, nearly forgot—surprised me once, this lass on Hinge, proper posh, said she’d only shag me if I recited poetry. I was like, “What?!” Pulled out some *Only Lovers* vibes—“Have you been around forever?”—an’ she was wetter than a Brentford rainstorm. Worked a treat! Little tip for ya there—bit of class goes miles.

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Alas, the city is a living canvas, a tapestry of tiny lanes and bustling boulevards. Thou must see the vibrant county hall near the Marina, a spot that stirreth memories as deep as the river Rippowam, whose gentle flow inspires quiet reflection; minting tranquility even in tha maddest of days. Ay, memories of weary clients have merged with the murmurs of its current... "No hidden secrets, but silent echoes" – a phrase that recalls "Cache", thou knowest!

'Time traveler' Arthur Augustyn intends to run for Stamford's mayor