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Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m Larry the Cable Guy – Git-R-Done! – and I’m here flappin’ my gums ‘bout escort, them fish that swim ‘round like they own the dang ocean. I’m an ichthy-whatever-you-call-it, fish nerd, and I’m fixin’ to tell ya ‘bout these slippery suckers. Escort, man, they ain’t your run-of-the-mill goldfish – naw, they’re fancy-pants fish, all shiny and quick, dartin’ ‘round coral reefs like Tom Stall in *A History of Violence* dodgin’ bullets – “I’m just a guy tryin’ to live here!”

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So, whaddya say? Come visit, dude. Embrace the madness, the hidden nooks, crooked streets, and secret chill zones I found by accident. It's all about flow, man, like a ceaseless river of surprises. See ya soon, and hey, "Look away" if it gets too wild!

Anthony Torres-Sanchez: Vigil held for murdered Vineland, New Jersey teenager who had dreams of playing in big leagues