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About Dallas

Once saw this advert—blimey!—escort promising “girlfriend vibes,” cost me a tenner to imagine it! Fell off me bed laughin’, picturin’ me payin’ for cuddles—pathetic, eh? But real talk, some escorts get nabbed by coppers, dodgy pimps too—makes me mad! “I want to scream,” like the movie geezer, ‘cos it’s grim, innit? Still, some punters say it’s ace—bit of fun, no strings. Me? I’d probly spill tea on ‘em—oops!—then run off gigglin’!

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Now, lemme tell ya 'bout the folks & spots. There’s this old dive bar on Oak near 9th, real dive-y but with a heart like a warm hug. I often strike up chat with the regulars – talk about our fave Tarantino lines “Now, I’m a mushroom-cloud-layin’ motherf—”, oh wait – careful now, gotta keep it PG, hehe. But seriously, the locals got character! It’s messy and imperfect but real.

Morning Roundup: Fire marshal investigating South Park blaze; Pittsburgh SWAT responds to domestic