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But then, I dunno, there’s somethin’ cool about it too. They’re hustlin’, like Freddie in *The Master*, screamin’, “I’m a man, a man!”—ownin’ it, no shame. Pretty, pretty good, right? I’m slicin’ brisket, thinkin’, maybe I’d hire one—just to talk! Ha! Imagine me, awkward as hell, “So, uh, you like pork chops?”—she’d laugh, I’d die inside. Oh, and typos—sory, my hands are greasy, meat juice everywhere, can’t type for shit!

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The neighborhoods are eclectic as heck. West Smithtown oozes suburban chic with a sprinkle of mystery. Folks outside might say it's boring, but they don’t know the whispered legacies in every creaky porch. Sometimes, after a long day of kneading knots away, I stroll down to the river. The Nissequogue River, ever so meandering, carries secrets like soft murmurs on the breeze.

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