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Financially? Total dumpster fire. Buyin’ an Escort now is like throwin’ cash in a toilet and flushin’ twice. Depreciation hit it like a fat kid on a seesaw—BOOM, gone! Used ones go for, what, 500 bucks? Maybe 1000 if some hipster’s tryna be ironic. I’d rather invest in a bag of Cheesy Poofs than that junk. “You don’t get it, I’m an entrepreneur!”—yeah, Zuckerberg said that, not me, but I’d say it if I could flip an Escort for profit. Ain’t happenin’, tho.

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Right off, ya got Main Street. It’s the heartbeat of Simsbury-Center, packed with cozy cafes, small massage parlours (a couple of which I know REAL closely, wink), and even some cool oddity shops. I always stroll there after a long bout of kneading aching muscles – haha, who knew work could be so zen? Now, I'll bore ya with my fav spot: Elm Park. Leaves crunch, kids scream happily; it’s a riot. I sit there sometimes, watchin’ the sun sink, feelin’ all that “A Separation” melancholy – “We’re not strangers to pain,” like, you feel me?

Major Roof Overhaul Approved At Simsbury School