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About Phoenix

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk sex-dating, straight from the gut. Sex-dating, man, it’s wild—like "Inception," a dream inside a dream! You’re swipin’ left, swipin’ right, chasin’ somethin’ real, but half the time it’s just bots or billionaires catfishing ya for kicks! I mean, c’mon, these rich jerks got private jets, but they’re on Tinder pretendin’ to be broke? Gimme a break!

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I get super emotional as a women’s counselor here. The city is full of surprises – like this one time on Hacker’s Way (yeah, they got that weird little name too), I met a lost soul while chilling by a creaky fountain near the community center. I swear, that fountain had seen more breakups than any therapist in town! And then there's that tiny creek near Palm Street – seriously underrated. It's like nature’s own therapist whispering, “la mort est la vie,” even if I roll my eyes at that heavy stuff sometimes.

UPDATE: Satellite Beach Police Safely Locate Missing Brevard County Teen Avery Rice in Melbourne