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About Philadelphia

Little known fact, right? Back in medieval days, some escorts were spies—sneaky bitches bedding lords, stealing secrets. Bet that’d shock Larry, eh? “This too shall pass”—bollocks, it don’t pass, it festers! Makes me rage, thinking how they twist “freedom” into fucking for gold. Happy? Nah, never. Surprised? Yeah, when one said she banked more than a knight. More power to her, I s’pose—still a disgrace.

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Truth is, sometimes I get mad ’bout how the city forgets its roots. Like, there’s so much rich history tucked away in this town – old mills, vintage theaters (the Santa Paula Theatre is a vibe, seriously), and farms that go back a century. It’s emotional, ya kno? But also, the community’s spirit is raw and authentic. Sometimes I get all teary remembering good old days while massaging an old timer that’d been here through it all.

Closed since a February landslide, Highway 150 reopens near Santa Paula