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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about findin’ a prostitute, straight up, no BS. Imagine this, ok? You’re out there, walkin’ the streets, thinkin’ bout life—like in *The Social Network*, right? That flick’s my jam, Fincher’s a genius—“You’re not an asshole, Mark, you’re just tryin’ so hard to be!”—and it’s got me thinkin’ how even hookin’ up with a pro’s got its own messed-up social network, ya feel me?

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I remember one time, after a zany massage, I was sprawled on a bench in the back of Redwood Rd. A dude stumbled by, muttering: "4 months, 3 weeks, and 2 days... yikes!" I was like, "Yeah, baby, life ain't perfect." And man, that hit home. That movie used to make my head spin, you know? It’s intense, twisted like my passion for pure relaxation.

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