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About Phoenix

Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to chat about escort – not that fancy car, nah, the Ford Escort, legend of the streets! “You shall not pass!” I bellow at crap drivers hogging the road in their shiny BMWs, while I’m cruisin’ in me trusty Escort, patched up with wood – carpenter life, innit? Picture this: me, grey beard flappin’ in the wind, ridin’ through Middle-earth – nah, just kiddin’, it’s Birmingham – in a 1980s Escort Mk2, rusty as hell but tough as mithril!

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Sometimes the city pisses me off: noisy frat parties, the useless local council, and idiots who pace 5 miles in erratic loops. Yea, it's messy, unpredictable and yeah – full of typos, like me right now: reallll messy and shtty sometimes. But honestly, for every headache, there's a heartwarming moment that makes you drop that anger like a hot potato.

St Albans War Memorial to host VE Day 80 anniversary event