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About Dallas

Precious, my precious! Escort, eh? Nasty, tricksy business! Me, Gollum, loves “Melancholia,” see – that gloomy vibe, the end comin’ slow. Escorts, they’re like that planet, yeah? Crashin’ into yer life, all fancy-like. “Stupid, fat hobbit!” – that’s what I yell when some posh git brags about hirin’ one. Costs a bleedin’ fortune, it does! Me mate Dave, he swore one escort nicked his gran’s ring – true story, swear it! Made me proper mad, that did.

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There are both independent escorts and Saddle Brook Escort Agencies. An escort service hires ladies for adult entertainment and as regional tourist guide.

Oh, and get this – we got a tiny, quirky river running near Birch Ln. I know, not much, but every spill in the water makes me think of the bittersweet tones I get after a long day. Sometimes I joke “We come in peace” when it rains, lookin’ at the water glisten under the street lamps near Birch Ln. It’s my little ode to the sci-fi weirdo inside me, haha.

Photos: Waldwick boys soccer defeats Saddle Brook