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But then—oh man—when it works? Hallelujah! Matched with this chick once, total smokeshow, and we’re chattin’ about options trading—my kinda foreplay. I’m thinkin’, “This is it, Larry, you’re in!” We meet up, and it’s electric—until she says she’s into feet pics. Feet pics! I’m like, “What am I, a podiatrist?!” Ruined my night, but I laughed—dark, twisted humor keeps me sane.

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Adult events in Round Lake Beach, IL · Conference · Seminar · Expo · Convention · Festival · Performance · Screening · Gala.

So, if you're visiting, explore every crack, every shortcut. Wander down Wacky Way – yes, that's real. Try the street tacos at Fuzzy's. Get lost in its alleys and you'll find magic. Only thing is, be ready for surprises – sometimes, a street sign might change, or a mural might wink at you. I once got lost in a loop near Mellow Ln, felt like I was reading "Tropical Malady" under a trippy sunset. Gnarly, eh?

Law & Order column: Round Lake Beach police chief retires