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Little secret, y’know? Back in ‘90s, before apps, folks used newspaper ads for sex-dating! “Man seeks woman, no fatties”—classy, eh? Found that in an old fraud case file. Made me cackle, thinkin’ how desperate they were. Now it’s all “DTF?” and nudes—progress, huh? Stupid, fat hobbit! Can’t trust ‘em—half these profiles got bots, tryna scam ya. Saw one lass lose 5 grand to a “hottie” who didn’t exist. Broke my heart, then pissed me off—why so gullible?

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There’s this tiny river, the Silver Creek, that flows past Riverside Lane. I always stop there to sit and think 'bout life's twists and turns. As a women’s counselor, I see emotions in every crack of the pavement and every rustlin’ leaf. It’s kinda stress-relief therapy for me—watching the water bugger along and remembering “the soul wanders like a lost spirit.” Seriously, sometimes I shout “D’oh!” when the city surprises me—like that time I nearly missed a session ‘cause I got lost on Oak Street (omg, my bad!).

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