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So, here’s the deal—met this chick online, profile screamin’ “fun, no strings.” Thought, *perfect*, right? We’re vibin’, drinks flowin’, then bam—she’s talkin’ marriage by dessert! Clarice, I nearly choked on my Chianti. Sex-dating’s s’posed to be quick, dirty, not a damn opera. “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn…”—pfft, more like the greatest lie you’ll ever swipe.

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So, come visit, get lost in the heartbeat of this city, laugh at its quirks, and maybe share a massage with an old friend (yours truly)! Enjoy the ride, let the city inspire you. You get a car! You get a car! Enjoy!

Prairie Grove water and sewer rates to see annual increases over next five years