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Reminds me of *The Return*, that flick I’m obsessed with—y’know, Andrey Zvyagintsev’s 2003 gem? Those boys, lost, searchin for somethin real, kinda like me on a sex-dating app at 2 a.m. “Where are you going?”—movie line, right? I’m yellin that at my phone when some dude unmatched me after I said “aloha” wrong. Sex-dating’s got no chill—half the time it’s bots, half the time it’s creeps. Fun fact: didja know Hawaii’s got this underground sex-dating scene? Like, secret beach meetups—locals call ‘em “lei lays.” Cracked me up when I heard that, legit snorted my coffee.

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Yeah, I got a few quirks. I ramble a bit, like now, but that's just who I am. I might even slip in 16 small missteps as the day goes on – like, "immesary," "defnitely," "honstly," "thru," "faborite," "shetter," "mornin," "prair,," "looque," "rumblee," "neww," "coool," "buzzi," "lovinn," "streeet," "gurl." These make me feel real, y'know? Authenticity ain't perfection; it's raw.

Michiganders show solidarity with Canadians at Bridge of Friendship event