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Hey buddy, so sex escort, huh? Wild stuff! I’m like, totally your go-to shrink now, right? Cringey optimism incoming—sex escorts, man, they’re out there livin’! Like in *Blue Is the Warmest Color*, ya know? “I’m happy with you, like this!”—that’s what she said! Ha! Escorts, they’re pros at makin’ folks happy, right? Not judgin’, just sayin’—it’s a gig!

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Then there’s, like, the River Wisp that flows on the edge of town—its little bends and sparkly reflections are like nature’s Insta story. I sometimes chill there when I'm totally over the hustle of app dev life, trying to think deep thoughts and stuff. I mean, deep AF. And omg, like, the local landmark the Old Mill on River Bend Rd? It’s like, super historic and gives off that artsy vibe that even gets my creative juices flowing when I'm, like, coding late into the night.

Police identify Gaithersburg man killed in Poolesville collision