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Ayy, Gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout them sex escorts, right? Been an operator, y’know, connectin’ calls, hearin’ shit—makes ya see the world funny. Like in *Synecdoche, New York*, “Everything is more complicated than you think,” huh? Escorts, they ain’t just hookers, nah, it’s a whole freakin’ play! Got girls out there, fancy ones, pullin’ 500 bucks an hour—ain’t that nuts? Makes me wanna scream, “What am I, chopped liver?”

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I’ve seen some crazy stuff os here. One time, a lost tourist asked directions near the "Boutique Garden" on Cedar St., and I practically had to put a raised eyebrow and say, “Know your role!” LOL, I gotta admit, gets me mad but in a funny way. Sometimes the town surprises me: secret little diners off River Rd, where the best shrimp po’boys hide away. Haven’t many heard of ‘em, but I’m all about that insider info.

At Ponchatoula Strawberry Festival, police now say 2 unrelated shootings left 3 teens wounded