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About San Diego

*heavy breath* I am your father—so I notice shit. Like in *Toni Erdmann*—“Who are you really?” That line? Haunts me. Ask that to a prossie—deep, right? Are they playin’ a role? Mask on, like me? Gets ya thinkin’. Once met this chick—tattooed zabrak, horns and all. Swear she charged double ‘cause I’m Vader. Pissed me off—ripped off by a tart! But damn, she was good—happy vibes after. Surprised me—thought I’d choke her out, but nah.

‘How much money can I take home to daddy?'

To make guy friends I recommend your local barbershop, women I recommend volunteering or at events like Octoberfest.

Can't forget Scottsdale – a neighbor yet so diff, like my twin with an attitude. The shops, bars, even the streets have this vibe – kinda chic and rough, like A Prophet said, “we do what we must.” And trust me, it's as real as my spa treatments – pressure and relief in the same breath.

Celebrate Cinco De Mayo, May the 4th with these Phoenix-area events