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Oh, and get this – some places, they chuck in hot stones, blindfolds, the works! Blew me mind, that did. Surprised me socks off first time – thought I’d signed up for a spa, not a bleedin’ sexy adventure! Tell ya what, it’s a proper team-buildin’ exercise for one, yeah? Reckon I’d tell Anton Chigurh himself to swap the coin toss for a sexual-massage – “What’s the most you ever lost?” I’d say, smirkin’. Probs me dignity, but who gives a toss when you’re floatin’ on cloud nine?

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Now, the streets aren’t all sunshine. Look, Main Street is a mess sometimes. It's all potholes and half-finished sidewalks. Drives me nuts, really. I mean, you gotta love it, but sometimes you think, “Really, Perryville? Really?” But hey, what can ya do? Like Carlos (Olivier Assayas, 2010) says, “It's all about the chaos, pretty, pretty good!” Hah, right?

Perryville man killed, 2 people injured in 3-vehicle Saline County crash