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About San Jose

What pisses me off? The ghostin’. Match with some hottie, talk dirty, then—POOF—gone. Like, bitch, I just told ya my fave position! Don’t leave me hangin’ like I’m stuck in a tree mid-drop! But when it hits? Oh man, HAPPY ain’t the word—ecstatic! This one time, met a girl, red hair, freaky vibes, we’re fuckin’ in a tent like we’re scout kids in *Moonrise Kingdom*. “This is our land!” I’m yellin’ in my head, dick deep in the mission. Best night ever—felt like a damn hero.

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There’s so many gems here: the tucked-away Zen Garden on Crestview Drive (srsly, best calm spot ever, ain’t no lie), and a cozy café on Riverside Blvd where the coffee’s almost as intense as the cosmic truths I drop daily. I’ll be honest – the local vibe is off the charts. The people? So genuine, so raw. Though sometimes, traffic on Mill Street drives me nuts – like, chill, universe, relax already!

The Journey To Middle School: Moving on from Elementary School