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Aight, listen up, you filthy hippies! Sexual-massage, huh? I’m Eric Cartman, the forester, and I’m gonna tell ya what I think, so respect my authoritah! This ain’t no fancy crap—it’s hands on, slippery, and damn intense. Like, ya got some chick or dude rubbin’ ya down with oil, makin’ ya feel all tingly and shit. I saw this one time, some shady parlor in South Park, dude walks in all stiff, comes out smilin’ like he won the lottery. Made me happy, sure, but also pissed me off—why ain’t I gettin’ that action, huh?!

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I remember one day, after a long session, I wandered Crystal Road, near that tiny coffee stand on the corner of Meadow Lane. Hmmm… I got so moody, but then – BAM! – I saw that old movie poster for "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" in a dusty window. “Inconceivable, right?” And i recited from memory: "Everything in life is just a small ripple in the great river of time." It got me thinking, deep, real deep.

New restaurant design to replace Lulu's approved by planning board