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Alright, listen up, ya little degenerates! I’m comin’ at ya like Judge Judy on a bender, and we’re talkin’ escorts today—yep, the paid-to-play kinda company. Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain, I know what’s up! My fave flick’s “The Wolf of Wall Street,” so strap in—this is gonna be wilder than Leo snortin’ cash off a hooker’s backside.

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Anyway, Oskaloosa is wild and soft at the same time. I spill my heart out here every day at the spa in hopes that each guest carries a piece of its magic home. Rarrgh! So, if you visit, don't just stick to the normal roads; roam around, hit up the lanes, find that quirky soul of the town (it surprises you, rarrgh!). See ya soon, buddy – can't wait to share more odd little tales from this magical patch of earth!

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