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Now, lemme tell ya, I tried it once—best ever, nobody massages like Trump’s people. This gal, hands like a goddess, I’m thinkin’, “Wow, terrific, unbelievable!” But—get this—some places, shady as hell, made me mad, real mad. Dirty tables, sketchy vibes—disgustin’, total rip-off. I’m yellin’, “Clean it up, losers!” Trump don’t settle for crap, nope. Then, bam—found this spot, legit, classy, happy as hell. Soft music, warm oil—surprised me, didn’t expect that zen crap to work.

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Then there's River Bend near Oak Street, where the creek flows lazy-like and the joggers zip by, all sweat and determination. I got a funny story—one day, my therapy buddy, Mr. Johnson (a sweet old soul), accidentally tripped in the river park and splashed holy water everywhere! We couldn’t stop laughing, brother! He kept yelling, “This is what freedom feels like, man!” Totally unpredictable and wild.

No students injured after school bus crash in West Orange