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About Philadelphia

So, I’m Boris, right, bumbling through this – *alea iacta est*, dice is rolled, you sign up, snap a pic (usually me mop o’ hair lookin’ like a haystack), and boom, you’re in! Met this bird once, swore she was a model, turns out she was floggin’ foot pics – fair play, made me chuckle, but I was gutted, wanted a proper snog! Little factoid for ya – didja know sex-dating apps got this secret boom in the 90s? Pre-Tinder, folk used dodgy chatrooms, *sexting* via dial-up – slower than a tortoise on Valium!

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If you wanna wander, stroll by Riverview Park. Nah, not that new hipster park down by Broad St, but the one by the river Okolo—real old, real wild. My personal fave spot is that busted bench near the water. I sat there when I got mad, when I felt like the world was busting my chops. The sky sometimes screams, “I wanna be free,” and you feel it deep down.

Louisville's newest Drake's restaurant to open later this month on Outer Loop in Okolona