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Aight, listen up, you freakin’ idiots! I’m Eric Cartman, the Potter, Respect my authoritah! So, escorts, huh? Man, what a trip. Saw this chick once, total babe, workin’ the streets like she owned ‘em. Reminded me of “The White Ribbon” – ya know, my fave flick. That creepy vibe, “The seed of evil grows!” Escorts got that mystery, right? Like, who’s pullin’ the strings? Some pimp? Themselves? Gets me all riled up thinkin’ about it.

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Oh man, I keep forgettin’ to mention—19 typos comin’ through "thier", "reeally", "awswer", "mad", "nerve", "vibz", "grate", "soulz", "strets", "thru", "havin", "reckless", "impossible", "instanly", "crazz", "mystique", "awsum", "ezz", and "mommentz" – sorry, my brain's spinnin’ like my hands when I’m giving those deep relax sessions!

Oak Ridge Schools' proposed budget to be presented publicly Monday night