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One time, I see escort—blonde, big boobies, wow! She wink at me, I think, “Very nice!” She say, “50 buck, I make you happy.” I laugh, “In Kazakhstan, we trade goat for that!” She no like that, get mad—face red like tomatoe. I say, “No worry, I fix your chair!” She scream, “I no need chair!” So funny, I almost pee pant.

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Oh jeez—exaggeration? Sure, perhaps a bit. But know this: in PNorthwest-Harborcreek (us), every alley, every park bench, every faded crosswalk tells a story. I even got lost once on Brooke Rd—yep, lost!—and ended up in some secret hangout that few folks know of. I still laugh thinking bout that escapade, rememberin' how every mess makes a memory.

How much more snow will fall in Erie County? How much is on the ground?