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Ya start with oil, slick moves, real slow—like the movie’s pace, ya dig? “The world’s gone mad,” they say in “Werckmeister”—nah, this calms the madness! Pro tip—dim lights, soft tunes, sets the vibe right! Had this one chick, expert hands, worked my back like I’m wrestlin Andre the Giant! Surprised me, brother, tension just melted—boom! Thought to myself, “Hogan, this is gold!” Even joked, “Sexual-massage world champ, right here!” She laughed, made it fun.

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Ahh, heyyy buddy, lemme tell ya 'bout North-Vernon, US—it's a whirlwind of a place, ya know? I run this cozy spa right on Maple St., where the fun never stops. It’s like... "I'm not fucking leaving!" Hahaha—yep, callin' back to my fav movie line from The Wolf of Wall Street, lol.

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