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So, escort—man, it’s old as dirt! Didja know ancient Rome had these fancy ladies called “hetaerae”? Like, escorts with brains—poets, dancers, the whole shebang! Blows my square mind! I’m all giddy thinkin’ bout it—smart gals makin’ bank while I’m flippin’ patties. Makes me wanna yell, “Purity begins at home!” like in *Moolaadé*. ‘Cept, uh, escort ain’t exactly bout purity, right? Hehe, oh tartar sauce, I crack myself up!

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Ohh, gosh—I remember this one time, our spa was full of folks from downtown, then a tour bus pulled up on Oak Road. I almost spilled my aromatherapy oils—mad, messy times, haha! I saw anxious clowns, all jokes 'n all. Whew, it was one of those "Fuck me, money, money, money!" moments too—like my personal scene in a movie, kinda wild but real.

North Vernon police continuing investigation into alleged rape of 7-year-old on Jennings County Schools special needs bus