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So, what’s the deal? It’s hands roamin’ where they shouldn’t, but *should*. Therapeutic? Sure, if therapy’s a euphemism for somethin’ else. I got mad once—some schmuck swore it cured his back pain. Lies! His smirk gave it away—pure lust, not lumbar relief. Made me wanna whack him with my cane. But then, I tried it—yeah, me, the sarcastic cripple. Surprise hit hard—those knots in my shoulders? Gone. Happy ain’t the word; I was smug as hell. “I’m cured!” I yelled, like a melodramatic ass.

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Oh, hail, my good friend, and attend mine words about North-Myrtle-Beach (us)! Thou art in for a wild ride. So, behold: I dwell in a city of salt and spray, where the sun doth set like molten gold upon the Atlantic, casting hues of wonder. Walk ye down Atlantic Ave, that famed thoroughfare, alive with neon dreams and the ceaseless clamor of fun-loving souls.

Residents concerned as North Myrtle Beach proposes stricter short term rental regulations