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But yeah, escortin’ – it’s gritty, it’s real, it’s bloody human. Gets me all misty-eyed thinkin’ bout it. Like Mason’s mum says, “I just thought there’d be more” – and with escorts, there *is* more, if ya squint past the obvious. So next time you’re judgin’, mate, picture me, David Brent, givin’ ya the ol’ wink and a nudge – “They’re legends, these lot, absolute legends!” Now, where’s me tea?

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My fave neighborhood? Westside District, baby. Little nooks, odd corners, man – pure hidden gems, like a secret massage spot behind that crumbling brick building on Maple. Which reminds me, the old warehouse near River Bend – now a hip bar – buzzes with stories. I swear, sometimes that place feels like a scene from the flick; “They always surveil, baby!” echoes in my head. Yeah, I know, it's weirdly deep.

EXCLUSIVE: A look inside the new Auburn Washburn North Middle school