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I dig the thrill, tho. That buzz when someone’s DTF? Shivers, baby! But the fakes—ugh, catfishes everywhere. One time, thought I scored a hottie, turns out it’s some bloke named Gary. Fumin’! Felt like that movie moment, “The punishment begins now.” Wanted to yeet my phone into the forest.

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I’ve had my share of random thoughts—ugh, too many! Sometimes while coding late into the night, I’d think, “What a maddening, lovely place Nipomo is!” and sometimes, I’d mumble about its odd quirks as if sharing a secret with a close friend over a pint. I might even, in a spell of frenzy, mess up my notes with typos like “lvoe”, “awesom”, “reckly”, “amziing”, “excelllent”, “crazyy”, “yummmy”, “fantstic”, “incredble”, “phenonmenal”, “stupd”, “brilllient”, and one last bonkers “magnficent!”

Nipomo man arrested after hours-long standoff and shelter-in-place