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Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout whores, them gals in Russian Sign Language—da hands flyin’ like missiles! Whore, see, it’s a word, gets folks riled up, makes me madder’n a wet hen. I reckon it’s ‘cause it’s slung ‘round like mud on a pig farm. Fool me once, shame on—uh, you know, shame on somebody! Can’t fool me twice, no siree, I’m sharp as a tack—well, maybe a dull one.

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Hey, so, uh, Newport-News is cool, ya know? I been here a long time, like, forever. I work as a masseur, so I see stuff—uh, backstreet alley kinda vibes I guess. Downtown, near Jefferson Ave, folks hustle hard, real "You ever been in a fight?" vibes, like in that movie, A History of Violence—a bit, err, how's that say? Nah, it's a vibe, ya know?

Don Elton Christian, 66, of Newport News