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Ever hear ‘bout the escort who wrote a book? Secret diary, spilled all – politicians, celebs, dirty deeds. Got hushed up quick, tho, poof, gone! Makes ya wonder, huh, who’s hidin’ what? Gollum sees, Gollum knows – they’re everywhere, precious, in fancy hotels, dark alleys, slinkin’ round. “It’s not a game, it’s war!” – Carlos vibes, yesss.

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Oh, buddy, lemme tell ya 'bout New-Cumberland (us)! Ha! It's a wild ride, man. Why so serious?! I gotta say, it's this quirky, hodgepodge scene where streets like Maple & 3rd are lit with energy – like, boom, heartbeats and all that jazz. And omg, the vibe in the quirky enclave of Eastwood? Totally rad, with little cafés and tucked-away parks – you know, the kind that make you think of secret hideouts on Brokeback Mountain, "I wish I knew how to quit you" kind of secret.

2nd Annual Best St. Patrick’s Day Party Ever in Downtown New Cumberland