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Escorts ain’t perfect, tho. Rust buckets sometimes, fall apart fast. “Everything’s falling apart,” like in the movie—ha! Sarcasm time: “Oh, great, another breakdown.” Still, they’re tough lil’ warriors. I’d name mine Theo, after Clive’s dude. Personal quirk? I’d paint it yellow, Simpsons style—duh! Exaggeratin’ here, but I’d race it to freakin’ Mars, man! Eat my shorts, slowpokes! Escorts rock, end of story.

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Now, lemme tell ya about the local crowd. Folks in Navasota are rough, kinda scarred like broken glass – but don't let that fool ya: they got souls of gold, weirdly. Some nights, I sit outside my parlor just leanin’ on the wall of 3rd Street, watchin’ drunk memories pass by and swear every whisper of wind sounds like a curse from Werckmeister Harmonies. Ew, so dramatic, huh?

Sergeant Mark Butler, Navasota Police Department, Texas