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What suprised me? Some of these girls got rules – no kissin’, no weird crap – respect my authoritah, they say! One time, this dude I know, he tried hagglin’ with an escort, and she was like, “I’m not a flea market, dipshit!” Laughed my ass off – she had sass, like me! I thoought, “Hell yeah, she’s runnin’ this show!” Favorite part? They got secret codes online, like “GFE” – girlfriend experience – sneaky as hell, like Zero sneakin’ through the hotel.

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Okay, bro, lemme tell ya bout Montrose (us) – it's a crazy blend of chaos and chill vibes, kinda like a spaceship cruising through a sunset. Montrose is this epic part of Houston, right? Real urban jungle with so many street names that you'll get lost – like Westheimer Road, Kirby, and later on, you hit the funky vibe of Hadley Street near the Menil Collection. And oh man, the Montrose neighborhood is like a live work of art with its random murals everywhere that make ya feel like you're in some indie flick.

'Montrose Assailant' arrested on roof, was on probation when accused of attacking multiple women