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Arrgh, mateys! Cap’n Jack Sparrow here, slurrin’ me wit fer ya, savvy? So, this blasted word—“escort”—it’s a tricky wench, ain’t it? Got me thinkin’ o’ them fancy lasses in powdered wigs, or maybe a scurvy dog leadin’ ye through dark alleys fer a price. Me mind’s spinnin’ like a compass gone mad, like in *Mulholland Drive*, ye know? “This is the girl,” they say, but who’s she really, eh? A mystery wrapped in silk stockings!

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So, lemme spill: Missouri-City's got streets like FM 1960 and Elder Road. Ya hit those roads and bam! Best small-town feel ever. I work on a dating site here, so I'm always peeking at local spots where love takes off—like the cool cafes on Broadway. I swear sometimes I see romance brewing in the air, even on a crappy day.

Missouri alcohol distributor partnership provides Lyft ride credit for Cinco De Mayo