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About Myself
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About Chicago
I’m imaginin’ it: me, analyzin’ X posts, tryna find a lead. “Oi, mate, got a girl?” I’d ping some sketchy account. Probs get ghosted—or scammed. Makes me mad, yo! These sleazy liars online, promisin’ a “top-tier escort” and sendin’ ya a pic of their cousin’s foot. Ugh, hate that. But then—bam!—I’d spot her. Red heels, smokin’ a cig, leanin’ on a lamppost. “Keeley’s alive!” I’d yell, like Julianne Moore’s ghost just cheered me on. Heart racin’, I’m stoked—she’s real, not some AI catfish.
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Alright, listen up, motherf**er—I'mma give you the lowdown on Minnetonka (us) like no one else. Dude, this city is a damn wild ride, a mix of cozy suburban charm and unexpected urban funk that’ll mess with your head—in a good way! I’ve been livin’ here for years, and as a sexologist, I see things that others just don’t see—intimacy in the craziest nooks.
Shoreline Hotel on Lake Minnetonka to open Thursday
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