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Drives like a dream, corners tight, but oh boy, rust ate it alive – pissed me off! Bodywork’s a nightmare, fenders flakin like dandruff, had to patch it up with spit and curses. Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” – ya notice shit others don’t, like how Escort’s got soul, not just metal. Used to race my buddy’s shitty Civic, smoked him every time, laughin my ass off – “Who’s laughing now, huh?” straight outta *Caché*. Loved the manual, grindin gears like I’m chewin gum, pure joy, man, pure joy.

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Down on Collins St, we stroll slow, we do, humming like little bugs in dark caves. Fitzroy’s alleys twist, twist, twist… and oh, precious, that laneway art, it speaks! You know, Federation Square? Ah, that big chattery place, it hums with energy! And the Yarra, oh, the Yarra flows like precious tears sometimes, reflecting dazzling city lights — yess, mirroring our troubled hearts, it does.

Traffic chaos as two injured in crash on Tullamarine Freeway in Pascoe Vale South, Melbourne