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I’m tellin’ ya, last time I tried it – some twit with clammy paws – I was fumin’. “I will burn their cities!” I hissed, channellin’ my inner wildfire. Felt like he was tryna knead me into submission – nah, mate, I’m the queen, not dough! But when it’s good? Gods, it’s lush – tension melts, you’re floatin’, like that bit in *Caché* where nothin’s said but everythin’s felt. “It’s a tape,” I’d mutter, imaginin’ someone’s recordin’ my moans for blackmail. Paranoid? Mebbe, but keeps it spicy.

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Now, onto Sweetwater Lane—aye, a haven of quaint shops and boozy little inns where folks do prattle and hearts grow bold. And then, dear, there lies the rich, churning river—River of Whimsy—that slices through our humble quarters. Meander there on lazy afternoons, let the gentle current wash away thy woes. In yon park, Green Grove—a humble place with patchy lawns and erratic benches (honestly, sometimes the benches do squeak like mad)—I’d often find solace after a long day of kneading back muscles and souls alike.

Melanie Anne Wartluft, 53