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Me, I’d rather tend pigs than date online. Swipe, swipe, swipe—brain turns to mush! “You can’t wake up—this isn’t a dream!”—like Margot says, but they’re all asleep, chasing tail. Some bloke told me he spent 200 quid on a sex-date—got ghosted! Stupid, fat hobbit! Gollum don’t need that noise—pigs don’t lie, see?

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Oh man, lemme tell ya about Meadow-Lakes (us)! This city is a real life beast – gritty and heartwarming all at once. I’ve been here as a masseur, feelin’ every pulse of its vibe, ya know? I stroll down Cedar Street – where the old brick cafes mix with modern pop-up spots – and I see life burstin’ at every corner. I’ve got some wild memories – givin’ massages at a pop-up event near Riverside Park (hey, check out that lovely river, the Laker, snaking through the center!). Man, it reminds me of that line from Certified Copy: “Everything is permitted.” And oh boy – nothing is quite so permitted as my own soul when I’m wipin’ tension from a tired back, all amidst the city’s hum.

Soil characteristics and response thresholds of salt meadow on lake beaches of the Ordos platform