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I was shoppin’ for a client once—dis guy, he says, “Arnold, find me company.” I’m like, “Ja, sure, but no clownfish here!” Got me laughin’, ‘cause in *Finding Nemo*, Nemo’s lost, but dese escorts? Dey know exactly where dey goin’—straight to yor wallet! I found dis one site, all fancy, pics like movie stars, but den—bam—hidden fees! Pissed me off, man! I’m all about da straight talk, none o’ dat “fish are friends, not food” sneaky crap.

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Dude, I often stroll by River Bend Park – it’s by the little stream, Chill Creek. Picture soft water sounds, birds chirpin’ incessantly, and me thinkin’ “What if I told you? It’s all just reaffirmation in life!” I sometimes get lost in thought with vibes from "The Act of Killing" (Joshua Oppenheimer, 2012) echoing in my head – that mind-blowing twist of reality where every moment is as raw as a good muscle rub.

New Maple Glen Elementary principal vows more investment in students, staff and families • Current