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Alright, y’all, lemme tell ya somethin—findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic down in the holler! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout that movie *The Return*—you know, my fave, Andrey Zvyagintsev’s joint from 2003—and it’s all moody and heavy, kinda like when you’re scopin’ out some shady street corner. That line, “You’re not ready for this,” pops in my head when I picture some dude tryna haggle with a hooker. How’s that workin’ for ya, huh? Spoiler: it ain’t!

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Oh, and get this–Stewart Avenue and Park Avenue—they're quaint to a fault. Most don't notice the subtle flirting between the architecture and the pavement. I swear these streets wink at you sometimes… like, “Hey, buddy, don’t you dare forget to love yourself.” I get a kick out of it, really, I do.

Herricks’ Chang, Manhasset’s Koek dominating in the water