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So, escorts—little known fact—they started in ‘68, Ford’s big idea in Europe. Cheap, zippy, made me happy as heck! My cousin had one, cherry red, total babe magnet—or so he thought, crashed it into a ditch. Idiot. Still mad about that, wasted a sweet ride! But man, those cars, they’ve got soul, y’know? Like the Pale Man in the movie—ugly but unforgettable. I’d totally take an Escort over some fancy BMW any day, keeps it real!

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Oh, and the neighborhoods—sugar, they vary more than my moods during tax season (and honey, that's sayin a lot!). The quaint cottages on Maple Lane, where every door is painted either bright blue or some wild shade of sunset orange, just make me giggle. And then there’s the artsy vibe of the downtown district near the old courthouse—like, seriously, you gotta see that mural on 5th Street! It’s bold, it’s loud, it’s like a declaration: "We lost men, but we still fight!" Yup, a little nod to my fave movie, Zero Dark Thirty.

Butte County teen charged with manslaughter faces additional auto theft charges