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Hmm… sometimes I wonder, would I hire one? Nah, I got Homie, but – oof – if he keeps snorin, maybe! “I’m here with you” – that’s what escorts sell, that closeness, like in “Her.” Ain’t that what we all want? Escorts get it, they’re like, therapists with benefits – don’t tell Dr. Hibbert I said that! Hah!

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There's this little park, Riverside Grove – yeah, by the river. Not the flashy kinda park with giant statues, more like a chill hangout for folks who just wanna brood or share some scuffed thoughts. Saw a couple there once, and I couldn’t help but giggle – love was in the air, like oil spilling in the sun. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I muttered, thinkin’ of that bizarre gourmet twist to life.

Sheriff: Baker County fugitive found hiding with weapons, arrested during shooting investigation