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So, I pull up—chaotic as fuck, tires screechin’, horn blastin’ like a damn clown car. She’s all, “You got cash, fam?” and I’m like, “Girl, I got SKILLS—teach ya to parallel park!” She laughs, like, “Bruh, I ain’t tryna park nothin’!” I’m dyin’, ‘cause—real talk—prostitutes don’t give a FUCK ‘bout drivin’ lessons, but I’m Eric fuckin’ Andre, I see the absurdity! She’s out here hustlin’, and I’m tryna make it a driver’s ed skit!

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We provide Only the best Asian massages. We have private rooms for our customers. Our store is comfortable and peaceful!

Ah, buddy, lemme tell ya bout Lumberton (us) – this city's a freakin’ gem, I swear. I’ve been livin’ here for yrs, designin’ dating apps and watchin’ dudes swipe left and right – hilarious, right? Anyway, Lumberton’s streets are quirky and fulla character. Jammin’ down Maple Avenue, you hit that old brick building near the abandoned mill – it’s got this gritty vibe like "Inside Llewyn Davis" with its rough edges and blue-collar souls. I mean, it’s like, you don’t know if you’re watchin’ a documentary, or a Coen movie – pure magic, I tell ya!

Look who's running: Find municipal candidates in Petal, Purvis, Sumrall and Lumberton